diel: (033)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-14 03:52 am (UTC)(link)
[ squinting to see the meme being born, it sure is bright

anyway

this is one of the few rooms yoru hadn't checked out in the first couple of days. the constant tick and tock, mismatched yet in time, had given him a headache just passing by the room. but now it helps to stand here, letting the noise wash away the thoughts of today's confessions. ]


Oh - Blade? Why are you here?
diel: (042)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-14 05:55 pm (UTC)(link)
I need… needed some white noise.

[ to drown the voices of the past. the voices, the voice - ]

Today was a lot…

[ kindness, empathy, sympathy - he doesn’t think he’s allowed those things and staying in that room had provided too much of it.

and there had been too many people in one room. dangerous… ]
diel: (032)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-14 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[ yoru hadn’t thought trap when he weighed his sins. he had thought of needing to get home by any means necessary.

trusting witch wasn’t really a consideration. he doesn’t trust him. ]


Mm. Probably… This place is a cage, after all.

[ no exits, no answers and vague excuses. ]

But you weighed yourself anyway. Why, Blade?
diel: (003)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-15 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
… You wanted them to…?

[ he doesn’t ask why. in his ears, the question is overlapped with the younger voice of a boy who doesn’t exist anymore. ]

So you got what you wanted then. Were you satisfied?
diel: (033)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-15 04:52 pm (UTC)(link)
[ sorry, he doesn't get why that was enough. ]

What... made it enough for you?
diel: (020)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-16 04:26 am (UTC)(link)
Blade…

[ the clocks seem to slow down time. it gives yoru a moment to study blade and to reflect on his words. it sounds like… ]

You… want to be a warning to everyone, so we don’t end up like you. Is that it?
diel: (014)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-16 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know if that's -

[ ... ]

Mistakes and change... don't they go hand-in-hand? If you can be, if you can exist... then you can be the catalyst for change without having to sacrifice yourself. You don't have to stay a warning.

[ he says all this even though he knows nothing about blade's situation. he's only going off his own. a thing brought back to life. ]
diel: (031)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-17 02:10 am (UTC)(link)
[ well, he is a strange boy. he knows that. he didn't grow up normal and he will never be normal.

maybe that door was never open for him in the first place. ]


Says who, Blade?

[ he sounds a little sad. ]

Is unpardonable the same thing as unforgiveable?
diel: (003)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-18 07:01 am (UTC)(link)
If… if you could be forgiven…

[ he asks this even after listening to blade’s explanation about unpardonable sins.

it’s just… after what he’s been through, he doesn’t trust society - any society - to decide what’s right and what’s wrong.

life is so nuanced - not cut in black and white. and there are monsters walking around unpunished. how could any world claim to have unpardonable sins? ]


If you could, would you forgive yourself? Or are you looking for one sole person to forgive you, if not everyone that you know and don’t know?
diel: (028)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-18 10:15 pm (UTC)(link)
[ his mouth twists into a weak thing. he thinks about that all the time.

can he be forgiven for what he did? should he have forgiven his father? his… sister?

but panic always comes when he thinks about that too deeply because no, no, no he doesn’t and he won’t and he can’t -

blade speaks of sins and yoru knows he has his own. ]


… You could try, Blade. Nothing might happen, but… but something could. And if you can’t forgive yourself, maybe you will find someone who can.

[ or as it had happened for yoru, someone who accepts all of him despite the unpardonable sins. ]
diel: (027)

cw: implied child abuse

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-19 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
[ that... ]

When you grow up in a cage, all you have are ideas and the hope of them. That... maybe one day, one of them will come true... That something good will happen... finally.

[ nothing came true for him until after. and even now, he's still seeking... to close his past. to shut that door completely and set that house on fire along with - ]

Before you sinned, what did you have? Everything? Or were you like me? I only had... one person.

[ along with -

that one person. he never wants to see her again. he wants to meet her so bad. ]
diel: (011)

[personal profile] diel 2025-03-19 04:30 am (UTC)(link)
It was… [ he breathes, chest on fire just to say the term. ] … my sister.

[ then he shakes his head because he doesn’t want to talk about her.

and besides, blade had said something he doesn’t understand or recognize. ]


Imbibitor Lunae…?

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cw: same

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